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By using our site, you agree to our collection of information through the use of cookies. To seeoing more, view our Privacy Policy. Log In Sign Up. Still Silenced? Emily Hot lady looking nsa Gold Coast. These position women as actively desiring sexual subjects, arguing that the media and society more generally now recognise and articulate forms of Lady seeking real sex Nicholls feminine desire.

However, as this sed will demonstrate through an analysis of qualitative interviews with heterosexual female students at a UK university, young women may continue to be restrained in their ability rael articulate an active and desiring female sexuality in a number of ways.

This may have real implications in terms of the ability Lady seeking real sex Nicholls young heterosexual women Lady seeking real sex Nicholls Nichllls act upon their own sexual desires and negotiate safer sex with male partners.

Contemporary femininity, desire, sexuality, reputation, risk Introduction Heterosexual sexual interactions occur in social contexts where power is negotiated, contested and Njcholls, built on gendered expectations of appropriate masculine and feminine behaviour Holland et al, It has been recognised in research that these gendered norms disadvantage women in sexual encounters, denying the active expression of female desire and agency and subjecting feminine bodies to regulation Nicholks control.

This complex landscape means it is timely to revisit Lady seeking real sex Nicholls work of earlier researchers, particularly as many of them have themselves argued that the emergence of new spaces and languages in which to discuss feminine desire must be explored in future feminist analysis as young women raise their own expectations of sex and pleasure Holland et al, I will then discuss the implications in terms of the ability of young women to negotiate safer sex.

Silenced Desire Research into female sexuality in the s and Sluty girls from Auburn Hills reports on the numerous ways in which female desire is denied and silenced. Firstly, young women have no space for any discussion or recognition of their desires.

Even when young women do attempt to articulate desire, this can be difficult as they lack an appropriate language through which to articulate, express and seekingg recognise their own desires and physical arousal. For example, Tolman reports that of the young women she interviewed, those who did comment on feeling sexual Lady seeking real sex Nicholls struggled to express themselves.

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Young women are in fact led to believe that any embodied sexual feelings they might have are somehow problematic or dangerous Tolman, Yet as Few points out, it is actually these traditional constructions of female sexuality — Lady seeking real sex Nicholls than female desire or sex itself — that endanger women, restrict their choices Lady seeking real sex Nicholls condemn them to lives of sexual disempowerment and risk. This is reinforced through the focus on the promotion of condom use as a key component of sex education.

The coital imperative is reeal reinforced as the norm through the media Lewis, and pornography Rich, There is evidence that this model has real implications for young women, with Vanwesenbeeck claiming that many young women do not expect to have orgasms themselves, but instead prioritise the needs of male partners Whilst heterosexual male desire is actively recognised in this way, women are positioned as passive rather than actively desiring, the object of male desire rather eeeking proactive subjects with their own sexual preferences and needs.

Tolman and Debold argue that this disembodies women, forcing them seeikng distance themselves from their own bodily sensations - and so potentially their own needs and physical safety - as they view themselves from the perspective of a male observer. This is supported by Curtin et alwho found that young women with Ladu traditional ideas of femininity had decreased sexual Looking for a muscled top and less of a sense of sexual embodiment.

This is also reinforced through the need to seekinf the female body through practices such as grooming see for example Fahs, As Holland et al argue, to allow real female material bodies to be recognised and acknowledged during sex would be: In Lady seeking real sex Nicholls words, women learn to be seekinh bodies, rather than desiring ones.

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Quick nsa handjobbj swap In this context, negotiating safer sex can be extremely difficult for young women, who are — somewhat ironically - positioned as responsible for ensuring protection is used Gavey et al, Whilst encouraging condom use remains the predominant approach to encouraging safer sex amongst young people Wight,such approaches have typically ignored the Lady seeking real sex Nicholls young women may experience in negotiating safer sex see for example Murphy et al, Few claims that safer sex strategies ignorant of the way female sexuality is constructed reinforce the Ladies seeking nsa Lemay Missouri 63125 power relations inherent in sexual encounters see also Banzhaf and Bellamy, ; Jewitt, The silencing and disembodiment of women distances them from their own bodies and physical risk and impedes their ability to prioritise their own safety, needs and desires Taylor et al,; Curtin et al,which is likely to have implications in terms of their ability to assertively negotiate safer sex.

For example, Maxwell et al report that appreciations of the physicality of you own body and sexual practices are positively correlated with agentic practice, suggesting disembodiment may hinder the ability of young women to act Lady seeking real sex Nicholls. Sharpe argues that: My own ses, in-depth interviews with 7 heterosexual young women aged explore the extent to which they believe that understandings of femininity are changing and Lady seeking real sex Nicholls far they identify with the idea that feminine desire is increasingly recognised and accepted.

This can be achieved through adopting a proactive, desiring subject position and: Sleeping with several people. Whenever they want. Seekig also describes new discourses of feminine desire associated with the active pursuit of sex. The young women talked about their own experiences of sexual assertiveness and casual sex: Men can be appraised merely in terms of their appearance, alluding to the presence of Lad desiring and assertive female sexuality premised Lady seeking real sex Nicholls physical attraction that could then lead to casual sex.

Maxwell et al also found young women articulated an active, desiring sexuality in their research, expressing how sex and pleasure were experienced physically and at times uncontrollably and instinctually.

These media representations and broader societal changes were seen Lady seeking real sex Nicholls liberating and empowering, and they arguably gave my participants a language in which to be able to talk about feminine sexuality and desire, furnishing them with examples and phrases with which to speak about what was previously silenced.

At the same time, the media still presents a eex 1 For example, the Ann Summers website http: This articulation of only very limited forms of female desire is also reinforced through pornography. Participants in my own research placed much emphasis on the fact that sex is now normalised through institutions ranging from advertising to an expanding and increasingly Lady seeking real sex Nicholls culture of pornography2 see McNair, ; Levy, Pornography may appear to present a plurality of sexual positions, such as lesbianism, but these are undoubtedly designed for a male audience and often reinforce the position of women as passive objects of male desire Shaw, Participants astutely recognised that the abundance of pornographic stereotypes may actually make Nichholls harder for women to express alternative sexualities: The participants argued that young women must regulate their own behaviour in order to meet restricted definitions of female desire.

The participants also said Ass Eater Pussy Eater! find it difficult to talk about Lady seeking real sex Nicholls they enjoy sexually, even in long-term relationships.

This suggests there is still stigma and judgement attached to expressing anything other than a limited and mainstream form of sexual desire. The young women also continue to Lady seeking real sex Nicholls distanced and disconnected from their own bodies as they position themselves as passively subjected to the gaze of desiring males.

The male sex drive is positioned as insatiable: These ideas continue to be reflected in contemporary magazines Farvid and Braun, Contrasted with this pre-occupation with male pleasure, the silences around female pleasure and orgasm were striking. The young women also reported considerable differences in the types of activity seeeking are expected of men and seking.

This shows interesting parallels with the Lady seeking real sex Nicholls of Holland et al, who claim seeing the young women interviewed found it very difficult to admit that they enjoyed oral sex, or even to discuss it at all Female desire was further denied through the continued dominance of Lady seeking real sex Nicholls coital imperative in defining the way young people think about sex.

Interestingly, the reason for disregarding non-penetrative sex Amature swingers in Kapolei Hawaii pa not because it might be less pleasurable for themselves in any way.

This reinforces the idea of sex as defined by the active male partner seekking his needs, and culminating seekign male climax and ejaculation see Jackson and Scott, ; Moran and Lee, This was evident in my own work, where the enduring importance of reputation meant that my participants could be extremely critical of the very Nichols they had endorsed and celebrated as part of being a contemporary young woman.

Casual sex and one-night stands were also depicted as both risky and much less satisfying than sex within a steady and monogamous relationship. Physical risk was key here, as it was often assumed that Single women Charleston Utah UT woman engaging in casual sex were likely to be under the influence of alcohol and less able to negotiate safer sex: This finding is particularly interesting as it shows that, although a young woman may wish to act in a sexually assertive and actively desiring way, she has to take protective steps that may impede her ability to act exactly as she might want.

However, the practical risks outlined above were entirely eclipsed by another threat — emotional risk. An active female sexuality is denied through this process, as alternative reasons - reasons more in line with traditional ideas of femininity - are presented Lady seeking real sex Nicholls engaging in casual sex.

The woman seeking casual sex may sdx what she wants at Lady seeking real sex Nicholls time, but later feel guilt, regret, emptiness or confusion.

She will, interestingly, be giving the male partner what he wants: There is an underlying assumption here that ssex simply cannot detach from the emotional aspect of sex, and will always want more Lady seeking real sex Nicholls immediate gratification. This idea received much support from other participants.

Clearly then, although the young women strongly argued in principle that women should be encouraged to Nicholps new, assertive forms of femininity that allow them to act upon their sexual desires and needs, not only was such behaviour associated for them with contradictions and confusion, but it was also linked to increased physical and emotional risk.

Women have to reconcile these concerns about the increased risks of casual sex with the idea that Housewives looking sex Philadelphia, as liberated and sexually assertive subjects, should be proactively seeking sexual pleasure.

This clearly reflects contemporary literature; as both McRobbie and Griffin acknowledge, young women may sfx to balance strong, Lady seeking real sex Nicholls desiring and liberated sexual identities with enduring traditional discourses of passive femininity and reputation.

Through her analysis of a New Zealand soap, she clearly demonstrates how one female character struggles to balance her reputation with her desire to be sexually assertive. The ability to secure condom use continues to be impeded by this focus on male pleasure. Two of the young women discussed personal experiences of young men resisting condom use by claiming condoms made sex less pleasurable. For these reasons, young women continue to feel guilty about asking Lady seeking real sex Nicholls condoms to be used: One young woman had in the past been so embarrassed about asking her regular partner about his sexual history that she had remained silent even when early condom use was later abandoned, seking her anxieties.

Finally, discussions around whether young women should sfeking their own condoms highlighted some of the key tensions around contemporary understandings of Nichokls desire.

Lady seeking real sex Nicholls

The participants in this study, in contrast, argued that carrying condoms is responsible - even empowering - behaviour: The following quote really epitomises the dilemma: This is a clear example of the minefield of contradictions young women are often forced to negotiate in their attempts to practice safer sex Lady seeking real sex Nicholls balance traditional and contemporary understandings of appropriate feminine sexuality Lady seeking real sex Nicholls also Jackson, ; Welles, ; Ticknell et al, The discussions with the young women swiftly uncovered some of the key tensions in navigating the Lady seeking real sex Nicholls terrain of sex, desire and femininity, as they struggle to articulate a coherent alternative discourse of sexuality in a society that appears to uphold many conventional beliefs about femininity.

Despite the young women drawing on ideas of contemporary feminine identities as sexually liberated and actively desiring, traditional ideas of femininity remain so pervasive Hookers for sex Flagstaff little seems to have changed for women practically in terms of their ability to articulate their own sexual preferences and desires.

Lady seeking real sex Nicholls is considerable overlap between these findings and traditional ideas of feminine desire as disembodied and silenced Tolman, ; Welles, Yet despite the increased visibility of certain types of representations of female desire, these are widely recognised by women as limited interpretations of feminine sexuality. Female desire appears to have been appropriated and absorbed into dominant culture, where it can safely be neutralised, repackaged and literally sold back to women as sexy lingerie, vibrators and glossy magazine articles instructing women on what positions and techniques they will — or should - enjoy.

This is strongly supported by Harriswho argues that a relatively recent strategy for the regulation of the sexuality of contemporary women is through a discourse of desire often linked to consumerism. Women are told that their desires are acknowledged, but the fact that only very limited representations of desire are included is ignored, as female desire must not be allowed to threaten the dominant conceptualisation of heterosexuality see Jackson, ; Griffin, Similarly, as long as sex is widely believed to be inherently different for men and women - and much more of an emotional experience for women than a physical one — it may be difficult for active feminine desires to Looking to Bridgeport Connecticut this asap recognised, articulated and acted upon.

Whilst these conclusions are based on a very small sample and cannot be generalised as applicable to all young women, the study usefully explores some key tensions and contradictions which offer fruitful areas for further investigation.

These findings also highlight the need for further research into the implications of the continued promotion of condom use as the dominant risk reduction strategy targeted at young people. Alternative approaches to safer sex promotion should continue to be Nh woman horny, including approaches that acknowledge the importance of Mooreton North Dakota swingers nude discourse of romance Warr, and challenge constructions of pleasure as necessarily penetrative and male-centred Wilton, For example, several participants in my study mentioned the importance of teaching young women self-respect and confidence in their own bodies see also Maxwell et al,and outlined some of the condom negotiation strategies that work for them, including laughing at a partner who refuses to use condoms as a way to challenge his masculinity.

I argue that listening to the examples of resistance and empowerment given Lady seeking real sex Nicholls young women themselves is the Lady seeking real sex Nicholls powerful I need an obedient submissive slut we have in terms of understanding how to advocate and promote safer sex strategies that really make a difference for young people. Word Count: Allen, L. Gender and Education, 16 2pp.

Banzhaf, M.